Steamboatmcgee

About Steamboatmcgee

I'm an old steamboat captain shipwrecked in this here little mountain town of poky-tello. Done much in these here years God has granted me. Had my heart broken and I've broken hearts. Spent 36 fine years (the best damn years of my life) captaining a fine vessel known as the pearl of the Mississippi. DonnaRapture was her name and she was a fine ship! Originally built at the turn of the century (when men still knew how to build fine steamboats), I piloted that craft flawlessly. I was forced into retirement when the owner of the ship sold out to one of them hifaluten lost Vegas casino moguls and they just didn't have no use for an old shiver-me-timbers type river boat captain. Dejected, I found myself tucked under the shadows of the Kinport mountain range with only my faithful mastiff Rex and the sad comfort off 100 proof Wild Turkey to easy my troubled mind. Until one day I had an epiphany: to wander these here hills, completely in the flesh as the day God granted me my first breath was the way I ought to live out these final, glorious years. No, dare I say, as the mighty Mississippi wanders on and on, you can't keep an old river boat captain like Steamboat McGee down for long! I smashed my bottle of Wild Turkey against a rock and ventured up the top of Kinport in nothing but a pair of old frog-hoppers! I had found my calling. To roam the hills of Poky-tello naked as a jaybird felt as right to me as docking in the sultry swamps of the deep south! But then I logged onto this website and to my chagrin I had to enter my birthdate one month at a time. I couldn't just enter my MM/DD/YYYY like a normal site. I had to tap back over and over and over and over again until I got discouraged and stopped at some date in 1984. I was on my 8th year of captaining by that point. Then, after the year debacle, I found that this is a membership based nudist website! I try not to spend money on clothes, why would I spend money on a social network!? Then I find out that this website has a creepy sexual feel to it rather than the wholesome body-positive community I was searching for! The vast majority of users are men and they all seem to want to comment on the various aspects of the bodies of naked beautiful young women. I understand, I suppose, but those websites already exist. What I'm getting at here is this website is gross. Like old grease mixed with stagnant swamp water in the paddle wheel gearbox. I'll leave this site like so many other men have in the past. Empty and not logged into for years. Sign up, gawk, leave. Empty shells of accounts scattered along the shoreline of a polluted river that had so much potential.

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