Occasionally over a period of 30 years I worked as a 'life' model. The work was at various venues where I became acquainted with hidden communities made up of ordinary, friendly people which I got to know and like. Poses were decided by the instructor, sometimes with suggestions from the model. I found a wide range of sexuality in the positions; some were as modest as a nude can be, some people would regard others as pornographic but there was no touching except to help the model into position. I can see nothing wrong with creating a little fun and excitement. I guess that is what most of the class and the instructors were there for.

BEGINNINGS IN ART SCHOOLS

I replied to an advertisement for 'life' models in a local newspaper. It was in a town about 12 miles away - in an art school in a narrow alleyway in the centre of town. I had passed the end of the alley many times before without knowing the art school was there. At the reception I asked for the tutor. With a smirk, the male receptionist directed me to the top floor, away from the other school activities. There I was met by two lady tutors aged about 25 and 40. After a coffee and chat about their work I way taken to the studio where the artists, mostly young ladies, were assembling their equipment. I was shown into a makeshift enclosure at the rear of the studio. As I was to find out, models are usually shown somewhere to undress in private: in the art world it seems that seeing a model undress is frowned upon!

As I walked to the platform at the front of the studio, the class directed their eyes firmly on their work. I was put in position by the tutors. An hour in the spotlight was very exciting. A 20-minute break talking to the instructors and some of the class was followed by another session of about an hour. My modelling career had started. Afterwards, the tutors told me about other venues wanting models.

Soon I learned that there was a whole network of art tutors. I received a phone call from a male instructor in an art school about 15 miles away. Sometimes, poses are intended to leave the interpretation of their meaning to the imagination of the viewer. He wanted to set up a study of two men. He asked about my measurements, so I told him - 5 feet 7 inches, 145lbs, 37-33-39, 5-6 inches according to arousal. He invited me for a session. I arrived nearly an hour before the starting time of the class. I was introduced to Tom, the other model. After a chat and coffee, we were shown into a small room off the studio where there were two screens for us to undress in private. Tom was taller and generally bigger than me, except around the bum and thighs. The tutor came to see us to explain what he wanted. We all went into the studio where the class was assembling.

I was put into position: standing, legs apart leaning over a pedestal with my back to the class, looking round to the other model. He was aroused by now - so was I but it was not quite so clear with my back to the class. It appeared to me that this was a study in male pairing where Tom was playing the man and I was about to be penetrated; certainly the class could clearly see Tom's penis and my bum crevice. However it could be interpreted, I enjoyed it.

Another study was of a mother and son. I was introduced to my 'mother', a generously-built lady in her mid 60s. It was a simple standing pose, admiring each other's nudity. Perhaps the message was about the acceptability of mature mother-son nudity or that mature ladies can have attractive bodies that can arouse younger people. Whatever was the intended meaning, she aroused me.

Some of the solo poses for me were quite daring. One was leaning backwards on a high chair, legs apart. I became aroused. The tutor showed his approval. Another pose involved lying on my side head propped up by one arm and with legs apart. We both enjoyed ourselves and I think the class did too.

ABOVE THE PUB

Several years later, I found out that there were at least two groups running sessions near to where I live. One was above a pub, the other in a church hall.

I had some appointments with a class organised by a lady graphic designer of about 35 in the upstairs room of a pub on Tuesday evenings. Her poses were the most explicit I have done.

Some of my favourites, which I feel are particularly good for a man with a big bum (I am about 37-33-39) are these:

lying on my back, I put the soles of my feet together and brought them towards my chest. My arms inside my legs, I brought my hands round to clasp them in front of my feet. This is a common yoga position and exposes the bum crevice and hole beautifully, and for ladies, also the vagina.

Another position was simply kneeling on all fours, legs wide apart, stretching the torso up and own, like a cat when stretching itself. As well as exposing the cheeks, bum crack and anus, for a man it also exposes his testicle bag from the underside, dangling below his bum hole.

Another pose, which exposes the penis and scrotum, or a lady's clitoris and vagina very well, is to kneel down, knees wide apart, lean back and steady yourself by holding your heels.

Some of the positions were difficult to hold for a long time so we had some short poses, some as little as 5 minutes. I was always happy to allow the artists to take photographs to finish their drawings.

The tutor told me that models were not always reliable and sometimes she acted as substitute. Sometimes she would join the model as a twosome.

IN THE CHURCH HALL

The appointments I have mentioned so far were in the evenings when people with daytime occupations could attend. Another series of appointments was with a man in his mid 50s at a church hall. Most of the class were mature ladies, some possibly connected to the church. Like the classes above the pub, there were some short, 5-or 15- minute poses for positions difficult to hold, as well as the longer pose.

The artists were always very friendly. We never asked each other why we were there or even what our full names were: anonymity was kept. One of them told me that she was member of a mutual group: the artists take turns to act as model for the rest of the group. She told me that she found this very exciting but left the details to my imagination. Sometimes I worked with a lady model in relatively modest poses.

Like the sessions above the pub, often the artists could not finish drawing the short poses. I was always happy to let them photograph me to allow them to finish.

COMPARISONS

There were many similarities in all the appointments I have mentioned and in others I have had: the format was always a session of an hour, a break for coffee and a chat, then another session of about an hour. The most substantial differences were in their mixture of lengths of poses and in their explicitness on arousal.

I always kept my bum, testicle bag and the base of my penis shaven but like most lady models, kept some pubic hair above my penis if requested. I also shaved off most of my other body hair. The art world appears ambivalent about pubic hair. Whilst some regard shaving as immodest, revealing a lady's lips and clitoris and drawing attention to a man's testicles and in some poses, bum holes of both men and women, in the past, nudes have usually been depicted hairless (and without vulva). I always kept my foreskin back and never had any objections.

The company was always friendly. We were hidden communities of ordinary people with a common interest. Sometimes I met other models. There were some men working at the same venues as I did but most of those I met were ladies. They were of all ages from about 20 -65, all shapes and sizes: what they had in common was a lack of self-consciousness about their bodies. Indeed, there was no reason for them to be: all were beautiful in their own special ways. I often wonder what motivated them. Perhaps like me, they found it an arousing sexual experience and enjoyed the company. Some would probably regard it as an easy and enjoyable way of supplementing their income. Maybe like me, they liked to show some particular feature of their bodies: there are not many situations in which you can show everything you have got knowing that it will be appreciated by people who want to see it.

SAD END

It all came to a sudden and sad end in 2013. I was working at a local art school. I had never previously posed for a sculpture class. What I didn't realise was that the sitting position for a sculpture class would be much more dangerous than for a drawing class. I remember taking my clothes off and putting them in a chaotic cupboard in the corner of the studio. The instructor helped me up to a podium about two feet high.

Sitting on a high stool with my feet on the cross-supports about 6 inches off the floor. My head must have been at least seven feet above the concrete floor. After about 50 minutes I had a short spell of back ache. I did not think much about it. It was mild for January. Despite having been still for 50 minutes, I did not feel cold. Suddenly I began to have tunnel vision. Blackness closed in. Three or four seconds later I passed out. I know nothing of what happened after that until I woke up lying on the floor with two ambulance men looking over me before pinching my leg and asking whether I could feel anything. I couldn't. I felt nothing as I broke my neck. I also had an injury above my right eye. I guess I must have knocked my head back sharply as I fell. My spinal injury left me with paralysis and very limited sensation below my chest, severe spasticity and double incontinence.

Obviously I deeply regret taking that final appointment. It was at short notice to replace a lady model. This sometimes happens when it is the wrong time of the month for her. Sometimes I feel that the whole episode as a model was silly; at other times I look back and remember the excitement, the fun and the friendliness of the company. Because of what happened to me, I am reluctant to suggest modelling to others; but it can be a source of excitement and pleasure if you do not rely on the instructor to keep you in a safe position.

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