Husband's who have wives That don't like nudity
Return to DiscussionsI really do not get the numerous posts from men saying their wives "won't let them" or get mad at them for being nude around the house or pool or wherever. Are you guys 10 years old! She is not your mother. Nudity is freeing, beautiful, natural, feels good and all of the other wonderful sensations it gives a person. If another in a relationship feels different then that's their choice. Life is too brief to live without doing what you want to do. When I started to be nude around the house I would get the looks and comments but I simply said " don't look if you don't want to see" I said this is how I like to be. My advice to men who want to be nude when and where they want is to just do it. If your partner does not want you to be able to do what pleases yourself then the real problem isn't nudity but something far more revealing.
About the only thing M insists on is that I dress for dinner, although that "rule" tends to be relaxed from time to time and particularly on holiday.
She is not as dedicated a nudist as I am and often dresses for warmth when I am happy naked.
However, I like to dress tidy for dinner and will not dress casually to dine so last year at Euronat when I dressed for dinner for the first time in several holidays there (it was COLD) I dressed like this, not being of the "if you can't be naked be as scruffy as possible" brigade.
About the only thing M insists on is that I dress for dinner, although that "rule" tends to be relaxed from time to time and particularly on holiday.She is not as dedicated a nudist as I am and often dresses for warmth when I am happy naked.However, I like to dress tidy for dinner and will not dress casually to dine so last year at Euronat when I dressed for dinner for the first time in several holidays there (it was COLD) I dressed like this, not being of the "if you can't be naked be as scruffy as possible" brigade.
Although eating nude is completely acceptable in our clothing optional home, when clothing is required for venturing outside the home I'm like you, look nice. Just as I want to look good when nude, the same goes for when clothed.
BTW, you look quit spiffy in your dinner wear.
Next time, if ever, that I get hitched I'll be sure to verify that the wifey is totally on board with my nudism. Preferably she would be comfortable in the buff herself. That's what I've learned the hard way to put on the top of the list in the way of requirements. I've been down that road of, "I guess I'll be Okay being clothed inside my own home". It doesn't work. It's like wearing a suit of armor around. Horrible predicament that seeps down into your feelings for your mate. Compromising your love for casual, simple nudity isn't always a healthy thing for a dedicated and lifelong nudist.
Next time, if ever, that I get hitched I'll be sure to verify that the wifey is totally on board with my nudism. Preferably she would be comfortable in the buff herself. That's what I've learned the hard way to put on the top of the list in the way of requirements. I've been down that road of, "I guess I'll be Okay being clothed inside my own home". It doesn't work. It's like wearing a suit of armor around. Horrible predicament that seeps down into your feelings for your mate. Compromising your love for casual, simple nudity isn't always a healthy thing for a dedicated and lifelong nudist.
Can a wife love a husband if she doesn't support him in doing something innocent which he so much enjoys?
Can a wife love a husband if she doesn't support him in doing something innocent which he so much enjoys?
Gentlmen, newsflash - Wives are people too.
Not only that, but wives tend to be women too, which only complicates things :D
Before anyone takes offence, please note that these comments are very tongue in cheek.
However, they make a valid point. Wives are not there simply to either support or reject your opinions and actions - they are people in their own rights. They also have a lifetime of experiences, of opinions, and are the sum of those experiences. If they are against nudism then they have a valid reason for that. It may only be valid to them, but it does not make it any less valid. Often it may simply be social conditioning that naked = wrong.
Just because your wife is against you being naked, it does not mean that she does not love you. It may just mean that you have a lot of discussing to do. Persuasion and encouragement do much better than bullying and pressuring.
I was lucky with Mar in that she accepts my nudism, and joins in in her small way. She does have her concerns and they're mainly about us being seen, and upsetting / offending the neighbours. As part of this she's also afraid of prosecution etc. as a result of that.
I am aware of this, and therefore take great care to reduce the risks of being seen - not because I am bothered about being seen but because I am bothered about upsetting Mar.
I do still have her rolling her eyes at me about how quickly I get undressed once we're in the private area of our garden :D
The intent of my posting was NOT to make any kind of suggestion that respect, compromise, give and take, communication should not be important elements in a relationship. Not all marriages are "good" marriages, where there is a "mutual" atmosphere of those elements. Many people find themselves in a union that does not meet their needs and desires. For various reasons unhappy partners cannot separate, financial, children, etc. Many people I talk to live lives secretly desiring things their spouse does not want to share or experience. If we are going to talk about a "good" relationship which should contain the element of truth and trust, then I have to ask how many men are on this site secretly, without their wives knowing? My main focus of the posting was addressing certain situations where I hear wives boldly tell their husbands they "can't" be nude. and if a man has such a wife and AFTER talking to her and expressing his desire to be nude and she has that attitude, then I feel he should do what pleases himself just as she is doing what pleases herself by being clothed.
I tend to the belief that it is VERY uncommon for men to do things secretly that their wives do not know about.
I suspect that in most cases the wives turn a blind eye on the "secret" behaviour for the sake of the continuing marriage.
This has been shown to happen in many cases where a divorce is nominally for adultery where the infidelity has been taking place for many years with the wife's notional ignorance but the real reason for the divorce is a more difficult to prove cause of the breakdown or even just a general desire for freedom on the part of the wife.
However, it does tend to show that "secret" nudism will probably either result in divorce or an open acceptance on nudism.
The issue isn't really about nudism. It's about reasonable people communicating and compromising when they don't see eye to eye. You should be able to tell her what matters most to you in life, as she should to you. Then she should understand how much it means to you and either realizing that it's a minor thing to her if you have clothes or not, giving in and letting you be nude, or if it is a major thing, coming up with a middle ground that makes it better for you both. This could apply to anything that comes up in a relationship, not just nudism.
Two years ago I had major back surgery. Our bedroom is on the 2nd floor so a bed was set up in the living room where I was flat on my back 18-20 hrs a day. My wife answered the question more than once for those coming to visit or help me when she was at work why I was naked. She told them it was a lot easier for her to care for me.
If I recall correctly it was 3 weeks before I could get back to our bedroom upstairs. Back surgery was an awful experience but being naked for several straight weeks was a bit of an upside.
Yup ... being able to stay naked for that long a time would be pretty awesome but not sure I'd like the surgery in order to do that. I need back surgery as well but have been putting it off. The meds prescribed by the ortho Dr. help me get though the tougher days. Not sure what your situation is/was but surveying all the guys I know that have had back surgery, it's about 33/33/33 % with feeling better, feeling the same, or feeling worse! Not sure what 33% I'd fall into! LOL