Male Bonding2
For those who like to explore the concept and dynamics of male bonding. Men are socialized in different ways in different societies, and so many men would like to have close male friendships, yet after spending time establishing a career, primary relationship and live in general, find themselves without close male friends. Many of us want male friends with whom we can share openly without...
- created by AZdesertman
"Straight" men with gay friends
Return to DiscussionsWhat's everyone else's impression of users indicating they're "straight" but all their online friends are men?
Greetings & Salutations, Before i express my opinion .. i just want to say that i respect your opinion and do not judge it... but allow me to play devil'sadvocate - .. .. why the quotes around straight? I'm guessing that you're not taking their word for it? So the real question here is ( and again just asking ) ..why does it bother you:1) what someone labels themselves? and 2) who their friends are?I never really stopped and thought about it, myself i just take people for who they are
Can I get a big ol' "AMEN!" for that? Well said, brother!
What's everyone else's impression of users indicating they're "straight" but all their online friends are men?
I guess your question indicates that visitors are here to meet and initiate relationships for sexual purposes. The chances of having sex with or even meeting the vast majority of people who you friend on here is quite remote. Therefore how is sexuality really very relevant. On the other hand, I am gay and find it easier to relate to men than women as i don't feel any level of discomfort talking about nudity with them. I rarely get any friend requests from women. If a woman starts a chat while i'm in the chat room I have no problem chatting to her. I have met straight men on here and am going to the wedding of one of my true nudist friends. Nothing sexual has ever happened and we are just mates. Why shouldn't straight men have gay mates? I think labels are what causes divisions in society.
What's everyone else's impression of users indicating they're "straight" but all their online friends are men?
Greetings & Salutations, Before i express my opinion .. i just want to say that i respect your opinion and do not judge it... but allow me to play devil'sadvocate - .. .. why the quotes around straight? I'm guessing that you're not taking their word for it? So the real question here is ( and again just asking ) ..why does it bother you:1) what someone labels themselves? and 2) who their friends are?I never really stopped and thought about it, myself i just take people for who they are
Can I get a big ol' "AMEN!" for that? Well said, brother!
And another big "AMEN" for this. Labels are irrelevant, plus, who cares? Having friends of the same sex does not necessarily equate sexual thoughts or desires. Thank god! Can you imagine if that was not the case?! When you really like people you become gender blind. I think.
Why do you assume all their online friends are gay?Some of us are homosocial without being homosexual. Just because I like to hang out with men and even be intimate with male bonding doesn't mean I want to have sex with men.
I'm not assuming their online friends are gay. I've checked the profiles of various guys like this and their online friends are either gay or also have exclusively male online friends.If I have gay friends, that doesn't mean I'm gay. If I have exclusively male online friends (which I admit I do) that doesn't mean I'm gay. The way you worded the question suggests that people like me are only pretending to be "straight".
One of the frustrations I have with homosexuals is that homosexuals can't accept me as heterosexual. I can accept them as homosexual and be friends with them as long as they don't try to convert me. But many homosexuals mistake my friendliness for flirting and then get offended when I tell them I don't want sex. Although I'm willing to be friends with homosexuals, I find that many homosexuals are not willing to be just friends with me.
So my online friends are exclusively male but mostly straight because the straight males don't expect more from me than I'm willing to give.
I wish straight guys would quit it with the notion of a secret gay plot to "convert" them. For one thing thats not how being gay works and is insulting.Likewise to my gay brothers, enough with thinking EVERY straight guy is secretly curious to have sex with another guy.Its been my experience that a persons sexuality, like humanity in general, is complex. Some are sexually fluid and are open to whatever feels good done by whoever they are comfortable enough to let do it. Maybe a woman, maybe a guy, maybe someone whos gender neutral. Acting on what makes your body feel good has ZERO to do with a persons sexuality. This is a concept hard for people to understand because we are taught growing up that sex is black or white; gay or straight. Remember, to go from white to black you need to go thru A LOT of greys.
I wasn't talking about a plot. I was talking about experiences with several individuals. They didn't try to convert me but they couldn't be friends either because they couldn't accept that I'm not interested. They treated me like it was a game to try harder at seducing me, taking me as a challenge instead of taking me as simply not interested.
Then those are the guys to avoid. Just dont lump all of us gays together. Many of us just want to be your friend.
You are someone I could be friends with. I wrote what I wrote because the original post in this thread was judgmental. He came across as one of those people to avoid.
What's everyone else's impression of users indicating they're "straight" but all their online friends are men?
What is funny is, if all of my friends were women, I'd be judged as 'homophobic'.I have many male friends, both gay and straight, and am more comfortable hanging around nude with them than I am with women, because (for me) there is little sexual tension.
Plus...isn't this a 'male bonding' group? That may be why there are men here with many other male friends. Just an observation.