Bromance SP
The relationship between two guys, heterosexual or a bit homo, it doesnt matter. It is a deep understanding of friendship for one another, that counts complicity and who has more affection, even if it manages jokes about being gay or not ... this is not the point. The most important thing is the support it offers to one another. Do you believe that? Did you have the chance to live like a...
- created by felixsoutham
Allowing sexual release for straight and guy bromances?
Return to DiscussionsHope we can discuss this because I think it need to be addressed in bromances.
As a nudist the one thing that I need with a bro is to be able to hang naked together sometimes. Especially when I'm camping because I just have to enjoy being able to swim naked in the lake. I'm not trying to do anything sexual, but most guys I found that like that type of thing are gay. I also rather hang out with a gay guy that gets turned on occasionally than a straight guy that wouldn't even let me swim nude let alone join me.
So what's the best way to handle to if/when your gay bro needs to get off? You would be a bad bro if you expect him to hold it in. Especially if your camping for a week and your the one showing him something he likes.
So some kind of sexual release should be allowed. The straight guys in the bromance should understand that and find how far they are willing to let it go.
I think the line for me is just jacking off together. Maybe some light touching if you really want to touch it that bad. That's about it for me, but others can find there line. If you're cool with going farther like brojobs, that fine.
Because gay bros should be able to enjoy themselves. It would suck for gay bros that maybe just wanted to touch it once just to feel it (for example) and not be able to. I remember I once had a female friend that just let me see and feel her tit so I could "just get it out my system" because she knew I admired her tits. I was happy that she just gave me that much because I don't know many girls that would do that for there male friend.
So straight bros should understand and let their gay bros have even a bit of little fun.
Ciao brother,
Great post, great points! I am a gay male nudist who has always enjoyed relationships with good people, regardless of their sexuall identities. I grew up where being nude with hundreds of other nude men was a normal part of my life. I suppose that is why nudity has not been sexualized with me. My uncle had always described me as being hyper-curious with few filters and no shame. It seems that has been the primary driving force in my life. I understand that most people are not quite as curious as I am, but I have found that everyone, once given permission and they get beyond their social conditioning, is curious about things that are unfamiliar to them.
Within the nudist community, people may feel more free and open while relaxing nude. I have socialized with nudists of all ages, backgrounds, sexual identities...Being male around other males, nude or clothed, creates a unique atmosphere that has become less and less available. Most males no longer have male only places available to them. I don't want to go on about the issues and damage this is causing to all of us here, but would be happy to discuss that if you like. Unobstructed male bonding is essential not only for males, but necessary for healthy relationships with everyone in our lives.
Nudist brothers I have met over the years of any age and sexual identity, have always had conversations about sex, sexuality, our bodies and anything else that would pop up. With any friendship, especially close friendships should always be open, honest and uncensored. We all need safe places to discuss our thoughts, lives, hopes, concerns and so on. Since your gay friend is a close friend, have you spoken to him about this? I hope you can, if you haven't. Many men I have known, personally and professionally, have relaxed their views and attitudes about themselves and their sexualities. Many of them identify still as heterosexual. All of them at least have curiosity about other males, minds and bodies. Some for sexual exploration, others for a natural curiosity about themselves as compared to other males.
I do not think that anything can easily fit into "pigeon holes". Those are man made constructs created to attempt to simplify and understand their world. Human curiosity and sexuality are as multifaceted as anything else. Be comfortable and open around your friends. If you are comfortable with a friend or friends masturbating around you or with you, then go for it. It doesn't mean anything more than you make it mean. I have some very straight friends that have been curious about a variety of physical and/or sexual things between males. Fortunately, all of my friends feel comfortable with me to talk about anything. Some curiosities have been purely discussion, some have been physical examinations/comparisons and others were more sexual. My straight friends that have pursued some sexual curiosity with me were very different than sexual encounters. They seemed more scientific and analytical. The experiences were physical, but not really sexual. I hope that makes sense to you..
Do what feels right between yourself and your friends...all of your relationships. Personal relationships are each unique. Don't worry about what others may think or feel about relationships they are not part of. Male bonding is required for all of us. Each relationship may serve a unique purpose in your life. Be open and honest with those who are dear to you. Free yourself of any societal restrictions forced upon you. Live your life as you see fit, not as how others would have it. Stay well, enjoy any close friendships you find. Treasure them all for whatever they are.
Hope my frankness does not offend, it's sounds like you guys a latent bi. Nothing wrong with that, good luck. Brotherly relationship s if they are Brotherly have nothing todo with sex. If you think your straight, be honest with yourself. Enjoy what ever the outcome.
it's sounds like you guys a latent bi. Nothing wrong with that, good luck. Brotherly relationship s if they are Brotherly have nothing todo with sex.
I'm straight and my comment was meant for straight guys. That's why I suggested just letting your bro jerk off instead of going further.
I know it's not supposed to be sexual, but many times the only guys that want to hangout and go nude tend to be gay. So if you want to have a nudist friend you just might to have be a ok with a gay guy that gets aroused occasionally. I also found that if you are strictly non-sexual they don't want to hangout with you.
So I think that we need to understand that they are gay and accept all that entails. Which means they should be allowed to check out guys, express whatever sexual thoughts they have, not shame him for having erections, and if he needs to get off to allow him to do so.
So for me a boundary I found was to let him jerk up off if he needs to around me. Because he's not enjoying himself if he needs to hide behind bushes or something to get off. I also found that it if they are curious and really want to "touch it", it helps to let them shave my balls. That once they get it see it up close and touch it, they tend to get it out of there system and will stop trying to touch it. Not too mention they also do a good job shaving you. But everyone should find the boundary where they are comfortable with.
Because if you don't let him have any fun why would he even want to hangout with you? Remember for most of us it's a long trip to the beach or resort, and we like to stay for a few days. So why would he go with you when he could find another friend that isn't so up tight.
First of all, our society's obsession with labels is sort of silly. We can't possibly know a person's real sexual orientation without doing a Vulcan mind meld and, well, without a Vulcan around, that's not likely to happen. So, I think these labels are irrelevant here. You are looking for a guy with similar interests - who likes the outdoors and will go camping with you, but who also enjoys spending time nude. I think your question is what to do when an erection pops up. I don't think the answer is different whether it's your buddy's penis that's erect or yours.
Sexual arousal really isn't any different than hunger or thirst - it's a biological response to scarcity - if you haven't eaten in awhile, you're hungry; if you haven't had sex recently (define "recently" however you want), you might be horny. Some guys wake up with an erection. Sometimes erections just happen when we're not thinking about sex. Given that they are a normal, every day human male experience, why does society demand that men conceal them? It's fairly easy to conceal an erection while wearing clothes, and not so easy when nude. Having said that, I've seen some male nudists work very hard at concealing an erection, and I think it's unnatural.
So should one or both of you masturbate? Why not? Mutual masturbation (whether touching each other or not) can be a fun bonding activity. Why not enjoy it together? I don't think you need to discuss it in advance - the only things you need to sort out in advance is whether you are compatible (do you like each other and can you get along together for a few days?), that you have mutual interest in camping, etc., and that you both like to be nude outdoors. After that, you just need to establish boundaries, if necessary, as the need arises. If you do start masturbating together and he leans in for a kiss (for example), it's easy to say, "sorry, man, kissing just isn't my thing." This will prompt a discussion afterward where you can explain yourself.
One piece of advice - don't make this all about his needs - it could sound like you think of yourself as "the hot straight guy" and expect "the gay guy" to fawn all over you. And don't be surprised if he has zero sexual interest in you - sexual attraction is quite unique to individuals. Finally, you have sexual needs too. What if you become aroused first (say, you guys are quietly relaxing around the campfire in the evening with a beer and you're thinking about your friend with the nice tits)? Would you rub one out in front of him?