Personally we view trying g to gets someone to become something is perhaps the worst mistake anyone can make. Is it more important to be true to oneself and be greatful to be able to be so in the presence of a loved one without adding pressure. Worst thing is to try to pursudae cajole in anyway. We find most visiting guests who started as a one nudist couple agree. It takes time. Good luck on a bliss full happy naturist couple future. Cheers
Shortly after my gf/future wife started, I gave her a news letter from Elesium an suggested we go there when I finishesd my project. She ws curious. We went. I told her she could wear her swim suit. I changed in the men's room and went to the pool. She came to the pool nude. She reasoned that a shy person got more attention by not being like everyone else than by wearing a suit. I vdry much noticed her. No one else paid attention. WE HAD A GREAT TIME.
Shortly after my gf/future wife started, I gave her a news letter from Elesium an suggested we go there when I finishesd my project. She ws curious. We went. I told her she could wear her swim suit. I changed in the men's room and went to the pool. She came to the pool nude. She reasoned that a shy person got more attention by not being like everyone else than by wearing a suit. I vdry much noticed her. No one else paid attention. WE HAD A GREAT TIME.
And it's a very good line of reasoning. "Gradual acclimatization" might seem safer or more comfortable for many women; but it's actually more beneficial to just jump in and blend in.
Kudos to you!
Why do you feel the need to 'convert' your gf to naturism? How would you feel if she attempted to pressurise you into doing something that didn't sit comfortably with you?
Just because I happen to be comfortable being naked doesn't mean that I expect my gf to come to the beach or a swim with me. I hope that one day she might take the plunge, but I'm certainly not going to insist. If I can practise body acceptance, can I not extend that acceptance to someone whose choice is to remain clothed?
This thread is a real "time-jumper!" From 9 years ago to 4 to now. I think it's a-ok though; if there are no new threads, why not bump old ones?If I can practice body acceptance, can I not extend that acceptance to someone whose choice is to remain clothed?
Absolutely; but there are also very good reason why someone would prefer their partner participate. From a practical standpoint; acceptance at many nudist venues is much easier as a couple than as a single guy. From a relationship standpoint; it is validating and "connecting" when your partner embraces nudist activities with you (rather than living a "double-life").
With that being said; it is also very important to be respectful of boundaries. When I first met my wife I went to the nude beach by myself; as she wanted no part of it then, which I respected. When she eventually decided to accompany me to a nudist resort - with the condition that she would not be openly nude - I also respected her choice. And when she decided to be nude with me; it was entirely her choice.
And the reality is: nudist life is infinitely more enjoyable with my wife by my side. And I did not have to "convert" her; she made the decision all on her own (with some encouragement from me) and in a sense "converted herself."
The best way (in my opinion) is to let them know what you are doing. A good relationship will allow the conversation. Invite her to join you without expecting fast results. The same as she Invites you to do things she likes. You may not always go to the same activities.
With a good relationship you can continue.
With luck she may join you. Do not press, invite.
I've been reading some posts with great interest. Myself and my girlfriend are not married but we've been a couple for ten years and lived together for seven years. In that time we have been nude together indoors quite a lot but mostly it's just been me. We attended one afternoon at a naturist park with a nudist couple and one evening party as well. Since the pandemic and lockdown our relationship has cooled slightly and we haven't been as close as we were but in 2022 as the summer weather arrived I decided to spend more advantageous time in the secluded part of our garden sunbathing nude and it has rekindled something that has always been there for me - my enjoyment of being free from clothes. I first took this plunge a long time ago and two marriages previously, around 1993. I was surprised back then how quickly I embraced the idea. After experiencing and experimenting a few different possibilities (including attending but not participating with a swinger's party) I found my own preference which was to be a mainly home nudist with some occasional park or party visits as well. I have brought this into my current ten year relationship and I think that my girlfriend is almost similar to me in that she's more of an occasional home nudist with only the slight possibility of being nude somewhere else. This is fine in itself and in 2022 I am keen to embrace things a bit more, try to attend more outdoor venues and perhaps some networking with other couples. So far my girlfriend is distancing herself a bit from this idea and she hasn't even been nude around the house yet this year. I remain optimistic but I know this is something that cannot be pushed or forced but I am hopeful.
More so with my first wife than my current one: here is the timeline I experienced - just to give an example of how much it can take.
Starting from the first time I brought up my interest in nudism (while we were still dating), and keeping in mind I went the "no pressure route":
- Convincing her that she didn't always have to wear clothes at home: roughly two years.
- Getting her to agree to visiting a nudist resort (with the negotiated deal that she wouldn't have to be naked, and we wouldn't be around other people): 1 year.
- Getting her to agree to meeting nudists at a non-landed club (with the negotiated deal that she would keep her sarong on): 2 years.
- Allowing herself to be convinced to put away the sarong, and socialize nude with club members: 1 year. (On a side note that was a really big deal and a huge leap; because up to then only a couple of people had seen her completely naked, and there were about 20 people there that day.)
- Agreeing to get undressed in the resort parking lot, checking-in and staying naked until time to leave: 1 year.
- Actually exhibiting comfort with nudity and a lack of self-consciousness about other people seeing her completely naked: 1 year.
So all in all, it took about 8 years for her to go from "I'm never doing THAT!" to being totally comfortable about being naked around other people. It was a journey. Of course it will vary from person to person; but just something to keep in mind before embarking on that path. It may take a lot.
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