RE: Random thoughts and jokes

Chocolate, too much of a good thing is wonderful.

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RE: Random thoughts and jokes

If it swims in the ocean, it can swim in butter.

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RE: Random thoughts and jokes

On the freeway this afternoon I was listening to some rap music.
Not by choice - it was coming from a car somewhere behind me.

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RE: Random thoughts and jokes

My ex was weird. In the middle of an argument she asked me, 'If you could know how and when you were going to die, would you want to know?'
I said, 'No.' She said, 'Okay, then forget it.

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RE: Random thoughts and jokes

I was stopped for speeding. When the cop asked for my license and vehicle registration I said, "Nope, don't have them."
He hauled me in front of a local judge. When he told the judge I didn't have a license or vehicle registration I produced them and said, "Sure I do, this officer has got it in for me, the next thing he will be saying is that I was speeding."

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RE: Random thoughts and jokes

Always talk to your wife while making love,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,if there's a phone handy.

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RE: Random thoughts and jokes

When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger.
You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

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RE: Random thoughts and jokes

Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along comes today.

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RE: Random thoughts and jokes

My ex was weird. Three nights in a row, no sex.
She complained about how tired she was.
I suggested a 3 way with her sister to lighten the work load. Wrong again..

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RE: Random thoughts and jokes

Someday I will be a procrastinator!

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