Your Opinion

Post #1 flsmoothieTextile

Currently working on a novella about three adults telling how they got involved with nudity. The story has a food theme. Would like feedback on version you like more:

1. Kathy savors the salad, thinking the evening is a threefer: good food, good story, nude man. They have a few more bites and she asks, Did Lynn ask her mom if youre nudists?

2. Kathy savors the salad, thinking the evening is a threefer: yummy food, charming story, ripe naked man. They have a few more bites and she asks, Did Lynn ask her mom if youre nudists?

Thanks!

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Post #2 nkhikerButt Naked

RE:Your Opinion

by nkhikerTextile

Version 1. I don't feel like the sentence needs to be that flowery. It will distract.

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Post #3 flsmoothieSuper Nudist

RE:Your Opinion

by flsmoothieTextile

Version 1. I don't feel like the sentence needs to be that flowery. It will distract.
Thanks for your input!

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Post #4 Maddythenudist122Textile

RE:Your Opinion

by Maddythenudist122Textile

Version 1.it's catchy

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Post #5 flsmoothieSuper Nudist

RE:Your Opinion

by flsmoothieTextile

Thanks. You are the second person to prefer number one.

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Post #6 LoggatochBarefoot

RE:Your Opinion

by LoggatochTextile

Version 1 for me too.

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Post #7 flsmoothieSuper Nudist

RE:Your Opinion

by flsmoothieTextile

Thanks. That is three to zero.

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Post #8 naturistsoakerUndies Only

RE:Your Opinion

by naturistsoakerTextile

Version 1 is my preference, the second is too suggestive and draws the reader down a path of assuming too much. It is, however, "you're" (the inner editor in me comes out).

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