Out attitudes havent shifted, they have always been that social norms and expectations dont change for naturists when you take your clothes off.
Our mistake was joining this site after being naturists for over a decade and expecting it to reflect what we experience in the real world. It doesnt.
We have never had a problem with single men on beaches or at resorts. For the most part they behave exactly like everyone else. Being respectful and approachable.
The OP reaction to being ostracised by couples on the internet is giving him a skewed image of what goes on in the real world. (Go to the beach, act normally)
I honestly pity the people new to nudism who join TN to find out more about it. Sure theres lots of great information but it also has a lot of nonsense that only happens on the internet. If they then take those nonsense attitudes to the beach or resort then we are all doomed.
Thanks, CodeBear, for articulating a lot of what I feel.
I'm not exactly new to the naturist world, having done sporadic nude gatherings over the years, but I am new to the social scene as portrayed on this site. I'm old enough to have formed my own attitudes toward nude situations and the people I find in them, but young enough (I hope) to be able to adapt to whatever situation I'm in, if it means that I can practice naturism in my own way while fitting in to what others are doing.
I'm learning that there are pervs out there. I'm learning that there are people who want to share their views with me, and people who want to inflict their views on me. I'm learning, most of all, that visitors to this site are a cross-section of humanity, coming to grips with something that is new to them and trying to figure out the rules, and discovering that the rules differ from place to place and context to context. Understandably, there is some confusion and need for direction, and with a little bit of luck someone will come along to address those things.
I'll keep visiting, in hopes of finding some genuine friendships and rewards among the dross.
Code, I look at every request we get. If it comes without a message Ill still look, but if the sender cant be bothered to include a message I dont bother sending them one.
If there is a message (non sleazy) like hi, Ill send a hi back, if it leads to a conversation fine but sometimes I think people are so surprised to get a reply they freeze up.
Ive come to the conclusion that America naturism (With Woodsmans help) is something quite different from European naturism. It seems to be more natural and relaxed here, we dont seem to encounter the same issues often raised (pun intended) on this site. Or at least no where near as often.
StevieLorna wrote:Woodsman suggested the difference in attitude to me in another thread. He is American who has spent time in Europe so I accepted his greater knowledge.
Remember the old story about the blind men investigating an elephant, and coming up with different metaphors? I think that our examination of the subject is like that. We're seeing different aspects of the culture in different lands and are always risking the danger that we're extrapolating what we see.
And I think Jehoram was the one that differentiated between the older, more organized culture and the newer, more free-form culture, and how the two didn't really associate or overlap with each other. But it does correspond with what I've seen.
And I have no experience with English nudism, or with any European nudism, except for what I saw in Germany ca 1970. But that was a different time ... we were all young, and we were all exploring barriers and identifying with a counter-culture that said, "If you want to smoke dope or drop acid or take your clothes off, feel free. We'll be there for you." So we did all of those things. And we were there for each other.
People who didn't understand that culture called us "hippies," a term that was coined by a journalist in San Francisco. We didn't like it much, and preferred to be nameless, although we did kinda like the term "freeks" ... free and freaky. If we needed a fancy name for it, we called it the "counter-culture."
We hated that song "If You Come to San Francisco" and other "hippie" anthems. Instead, we listened to the Jefferson Airplane and Jimi Hendrix and the Grateful Dead.
We knew the world was changing, and we wanted to be part of that change. What we didn't realize was that the world wasn't going to change very much, after all. But it did change, in ways that are still being felt.
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