Gay identity and the Buddhist idea of non-self

My husband and I are active in our local Buddhist temple - a historically Japanese Soto Zen congregation, working successfully to broaden its appeal to the wider community. Needless to say, as two men married to one another, we are "out." But recently, the temple board approved the formation of a specifically gay group within the temple - the Gay Sangha.
I've of course been invited to help with that group, and have agreed to do so. But I have real misgivings. Buddhist teaching is that there's no permanent, separate, individual identity. We are all part of a single Universe or karmic stream; clinging to some aspect of existence - gay, straight, or bi, Democrat, dyslexic, depressed or Dutch - as if it were indispensable is a mistake, and a source of suffering.
Asserting gay identity, gay pride, has proven to be an effective political strategy for letting millions of people live safer, more productive lives. As part of the gay movement, way back when, I took up the label - Gay - as a political act. But within our spiritual practice, the label doesn't seem to have a place. I realize the temple is using the group to make clear to the community that all are welcome, and that Buddhism has no interest in changing anyone's sexuality. And I suppose we might serve as support for a few individuals who would not look elsewhere. I'm trying to imagine how to navigate the acceptance of gay identity and the surrender of all identity, as one of the de facto leaders of this group. Your thoughts?

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