Exhibitionism

Nudists are often accused of being exhibitionists. And to a certain degree this is true. Not in the official, medical sense, which is something like "deriving exclusive or main sexual satisfaction from exposing one's naked body to, usually unsuspecting, other persons".

I don't think most nudists are exhibitionists by this definition. We do have a sex life and derive most of our sexual pleasure from it. But like everything in life which concerns billions of people, exhibitionism is a gradient and the starting point is looking forward to dropping your kit in front of other people. A step we have all taken.

I have always been under the impression that the vast majority of men are attracted to nudism because they can see naked women for free. I know that this is what attracted D and most guys I spoke with while on a nudist beach or in a nudist resort. They put it differently of course, something-something about nature and being in sync with it, about how nudists are nicer, more sincere, more equal etc. But if you know how to ask your questions you eventually get to the root of it: they are there for the chicks.

Which is both my experience and what evolutionist logic would point to. As for my experience, when my naked self appears in a society, you can bet that the guys who haven't looked at me within 30 seconds are either gay or dead. I also made the case before of why evolution made us ladies nicer to look at than guys and guys more keen to look at women than the other way round: as men's winning strategy was to impregnate as many of us as possible, spending only 5 min and 5 ml of seminal fluid on each of us, their main trigger was signals of fertility (aka sexiness); as this would result in a 5-year struggle to raise the resulting offspring, we needed their help with that so we developed a far more refined and diversified palate.

Even I, as a mostly (albeit, like a majority of women, not exclusively) hetero woman, like to look more at the girls than at the guys on a nudist beach. Let's face it, they are on average far nicer to look at.

Yet, if the guys in this group are in any way statistically representative, I was wrong all along. A while ago I asked them one question: if you are in a group of good-looking women (or men, if you are gay) on a beach, would you rather be the only one naked or the only one dressed? And all the guys who answered said "the only one naked". What's going on here? No idea, hence this topic.

So let's define a scale of exhibitionism.
1. I hate the very idea of being seen naked by anyone but my spouse.
2. I'm shy but I won't make a heart attack if someone once gets a glimpse of my body. I'll still be embarrassed to talk to that person afterwards though.
3. I'm fine with nudity when it's required, say in a medical context or if I want to enjoy a sauna in Germany (and I love saunas, but they are all nude and coed there).
4. When in Rome... I am ok with being naked in nudist contexts but it's just because it's so much more comfy.
5. I'm a nudist and I always look for nudist get-aways.
6. I actually enjoy being seen naked but there is nothing sexual about it, I'm just proud of my body - let them see something nice.
7. I do sometimes get a bit of a sexual tingling from being seen naked.
8. Being seen naked and even remembering it does trigger erotic feelings.
9. I often masturbate remembering how people have seen me naked.
10. I can barely imagine a satisfying sex life without my nudity or memories thereof.

Now, this is not a scientific scale, I just made it up - and sure enough, everyone of the 1.5 persons who will answer will define themselves around 4-5.

So let me go first. I think I'm a 6. I progressed all the way from a solid 1. I used to be very shy, not even my mother could see me naked and I would avoid going to see a doctor because they always wanted me topless for the heart-lungs-pressure exam. I'm not really a 5 though - I don't define myself as a nudist and look more to go to nice as opposed to nudist places for holidays. The couple of times I danced naked for a dressed audience (I told that story - once on bar tables in Cap and once in a club) I did get a bit aroused - but it was a very erotic atmosphere, lots of alcohol involved and lots of expressions of appreciation... So it was a special context, I don't think I'm a 7, I normally don't get any sexual reaction from showing myself naked. But I progressed and now I don't mind all those eyes on my body, I take it not as an insult but as a compliment.

All with the usual caveats, meaning respecting the generally acceptable rules of the place. If you stare for too long or if you make rude gestures or comments or if you flaunt your erection I will feel insulted - except if the rules of the place accept it. Compliments about my body parts, sexual offers and erections are expected say on the Pigs' Bay beach in Cap so I took them as compliments when I visited. Use your good sense, show social awareness and all is good, you can look, I won't mind it.

But I don't expose myself for sexual satisfaction and I don't want to shock or disturb unsuspecting people. Are there exceptions to this rule? Rarely, but there were a couple. During the last-but-one holidays we spent (in a non nudist place) we converted two young couples to nudism and the ladies had a tendency to overshoot. So we did a few stunts, each of us did a hotel dare, we drove around in a convertible and took nude pics in (almost) empty city squares and a railway station. But it was a sort of ganging up to do bad-girl stuff rather than something I did with pleasure by myself. I could tell that story in another topic.

But I do understand now the pleasure of exhibitionism, maybe even its erotic part (in the right context and company and with enough alcohol on board some forms of exhibitionism can turn to be erotic) but especially the adrenaline rush when facing the risk of being exposed. It's something like rollercoasters. I don't actually like them, I was on a few rides by curiosity, I do not intend to repeat the experience but I do understand why some people are addicted to them. Just not for me.

So now let's fish for the 1.5 average response rate I get in August: on my scale of 1 to 10, how much of an exhibitionist are you?

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