Nudity or your significant other
I have been a nudist since I was in my early twenties. It's been a big part of my life. It's something I won't give up even if that only means my remaining a home nudist. My girlfriend on the other hand doesn't approve of the lifestyle. I told her when I stopped at a nudist resort on my way back from Ohio. she was shocked I would go there alone. I told her that I spent the time with the gentleman who showed me around. I told her I talked with other nudists and one who has a medical problem similar to mine. I told her about the place and how open and friendly the people were there. I tried to explain that it doesn't matter what body style or shape you have. All are welcome as friends without judgement. I told her it was refreshing, comfortable and easy. It was being part of something. She wasn't thrilled.
She knows I like to be naked and I asked her early in out relationship to go with me to Empire Haven. after explaining what it was she said NO. She sees nudists resorts or "the naked place" as she calls it as a free for all sex for all. She didn't ask me not to go again but she will probably won't try it. It has a lot to do with the way she was raised. She is one who believes that it is a cult, a meeting place for gays, unscrupulous and irresponsible people who are trying to recapture their prime years and orgy the day away. It's hard to change that kind of attitude and belief.
If it comes to the point where she says "It's me or the naked place." I will pick her hands down. She will always be first and I will simply be a home nudist. Years ago I met with two nudists here at my place that I got to know at work. Unfortunately, It was discovered that they were nudists and were badly treated and made to feel unwelcome, and left the area. I never told her about them being nudists.
I'm sure if she tried it she would see it for what it really is. I wont bring it up again until she does. Does anyone have a similar situation or any ideas how I can make her understand?
John
I feel your pain bro. I told you about my son and how I wish I could tell him but I'm afraid of what he will think of me. The world is just so closed minded. But I can see her point too. And being a woman she may have a different point of view. After all how many are on this site just to look at a beautiful body and turn a trick. I know you say that is not the norm or shouldn't be but how can it really be controlled and who do you trust? So I can see she might feel differently about it men do.
Sorry that wasn't much help. Coribin.
Well...it's a tough one.
On the positive side, many of the nudist women I've met and talked to had initially said "NO!" when their partner first brought it up. My wife included. It was often through sustained conversations about it that they eventually decided to give it a chance (often with the stipulation that they would not get naked). And then they get there, (hopefully) their concerns are assuaged when they see other women comfortable being openly naked (my wife was naked in the pool area within an hour of us arriving).
But...it doesn't always happen that way. Sometimes there is no amount of conversation that will change their minds. The key is to recognize when conversations are possible...or not.
I didn't realise the luck I had with my wife. She was used to go to the nudist evening in a spa with her parents. A few weeks after we met she went with them on holidays at a nude camping-site in Austria. She never had a problem with being nude or being seen nude. Only if there were too much clothed people at the beach she wore a bathing-suit.
I hope you can change the mind of your wife. Maybe a nudist woman can persuade her about the joy of nudism.
I have to chime in on Nudony's point some say females say a hard NO. I certainly can't blame them given the track record the male kind has laid down. It took my Luann 15 yrs to graduate from home nudist to the social side. By nature she is pretty shy, not fond of pictures being taken of her and worn out of being dogged after.
Who knew she would be a member of a nudist club for 10 yrs now and host home get togethers? For me I can't go back to wearing clothes or being frowned upon because I choose not to.
My first wife was a hard NO kind of gal. I was raised with no importance placed on clothing in the house and sometimes out for that matter. There was never a point to be nude. There were just times being nude was normal. Which brings me back to my first wife as an example. When I say she was a hard no, she really did not want me to see her either. Lights were always off and even sex was under covers if she had her way.
Then the military took us to Germany. It was my first duty station after initial training. We were young. Still newly married. I was in Germany first. I had to have housing before she could come. We had an apartment on the economy and there was a large swimming area just down the street. She wanted to go. I told her that most of the women would at least sun topless. Many women would walk around topless also. This was important because she believed there was absolutely no reason I should see another woman naked. We did go. She picked the spot to lay down. She found that there really was no way to avoid me being near another topless woman. She remained in her top. She did wear a two piece swim suit. By the third time we went swimming she layed out topless. It was clear that I noticed her but I did not mention it until the subject came up later that evening. She explained that everyone was topless and she felt she was getting more attention wearing her top than after she took it off. Eventually, she got to the point that once we were in the swimming area she did not put the top back on until we left.
Moral of the story nudity was not made abnormal and forced. In her case toplessness was the norm and she felt comfortable that way at the swimming pool only.
Nice to learn more about your coming to be a nudist story, want2bfree. Know that more of us have that same regret than don't, about wishing to have found out earlier in life about nudism and the pleasant folks who call themselves nudists. I feel that regrets don't add much to life, so I'll gently suggest that you try instead to keep yourself focused on the bared present, and look forward to the rest of your life being richer for having found the beauty of nudism, and before you were an octogenarian! And give your boyfriend a big wet smooch for his introducing you to what sounds like has now become something of an obsession for you. Staying naked as much as possible and in the company of others who do the same will enrich every aspect of your life, and generally cuts down immensely on the laundering!
I hear you. But even after making love she won't lay with me and just talk or cuddle with me. After ten minutes she has to put PJs on and gets back into bed. I don't' push it. I have to respect her decision. It comes up from time to time but I think it has a lot to do with how she was raised. It's kind of hard wired into her. It's OK though. I love her just the same.